How to
Grooming Guide: Come Clean
You’ve proudly rocked your facial hair since high school and wouldn’t part with it for the world. You’ve used our maintenance tips for that goatee and been the man at the Holiday parties thus far. But you’ve got a newborn on the way or a special request from your lady to be facial hair free for […]
How To Get Jay-Z & Kanye West To Perform For You
Jay-Z and Kanye West‘s Watch The Throne Tour sold out in many of the cities it hit, but did you know that you can get the duo also known as “The Throne” to perform for you? This month they charged almost $6 million (that ish cray) to perform at a Sweet 16 party in Dubai, […]
Manly Rules for Naming Man’s Best Friend
Presidents are notorious for giving their dogs politically correct names (See: Bill Clinton re: Buddy or Gerald Ford re: Liberty). Lyndon Johnson even had a pair of beagles he simply named Him and Her. But our manliest president, Teddy Roosevelt, would have none of that. Not only does he have a dog breed named after […]
Practical Wisdom get your self Some…
In 2008, Christopher Ratte and his seven-year-old son were attending a Detroit Tigers game together. When Ratte went to the concession stand, he grabbed a beer for himself and a Mike’s Hard Lemonade for his son, unaware that the drink contained 5% alcohol. When a security guard saw Ratte’s son nursing the bottle of the […]
The 3 Characteristics of an Educated Man
What defines an educated man? The number of degrees he has? The size of his vocabulary? How many books he’s read? The qualities that constitute an educated man can be argued over and debated. But I was really taken with the description I found in the book How to Live the Good Life by Commander […]
How To: The Art of Conversation
Last month I met up with an old friend I hadn’t seen in forever to have lunch. Having both read and written about how to be an effective and charismatic conversationalist, I followed the old dictum of listening more than talking and asking the other person engaging questions about themselves. This is supposed to charm […]
How to: Craft the Life You Want
The Wear the Pants™ Project Content Series is sponsored by Dockers. Win $100K to finally do what you love. Enter now. What’s this? The craftsman is an archetype of manliness that has been with us for millenia. We admire his independence, his work ethic, and his unwavering sense of purpose. We envy the way he personally […]
Dont Be a Monster, 9 Ways To Start a Fire
There is a primal link between man and fire. Every man should know how to start one. A manly man knows how to start one without matches. It’s an essential survival skill. You never know when you’ll find yourself in a situation where you’ll need a fire, but you don’t have matches. Maybe your single […]
Introduction to Stocks: Learn how to “Diversify Yo Bonds Nigga”
Basic Stock Information to Get You Started The first step for you to understand the stock market is to understand stocks. The Goons can help you with this.
How To Cheat Without Getting Caught
Over the past year I’ve been much more open to getting into a relationship with a girl I like, but unfortunately I can’t tame the dog inside me that wants to fuck a new girl every other week. So my current game strategy is to get a girl-next-door type who isn’t a club rat and […]
How to Roll a Blunt
Okay the other night myself and some Goons were a Party to an Herbal session, Long story short. This Dude rolls a monstrosity that was soaking wet and leaking mist out the side. It was truly sad. the next day I was talking to Mary and she put this together for novice rollers.
How to make Crack Cocaine
I actually struggled with myself as to whether or not to actually share this information, but ultimately I decided to post it for the following reasons:
How To Create A Rapper Name
As a rapper, you’re going to need an alias. It will become your identity. The first thing people will find out about you is your name. Is yours catchy enough? We’ve all seen rappers with names we wish we would have made up. In this post, I’m going to explain how to create a rapper […]
How to become a Pimp
How you doin’, sweet thang? My name’s John Shaft, and I’ll be your host tonight. Welcome to “How to be a Pimp”, the exclusive online guide that tells you how to be a pimp. Follow these eight easy steps and you’ll be big pimpin’ in no time. I’ll tell you how to do all of the pimp […]
How to Get Away With Murder
Nathan: Dave, do you have a favorite serial killer? Dave: Get out of my bar. All right, way too many of you people have been arrested for murder lately and I’m starting to get a little pissed off. If this generation is gonna have a chance in hell of surviving in today’s brutal DNA-evidence-laden world, […]
Gangs Goons and Gunz 